I don't think I've ever said this before but one of my biggest regret was not having another child while I was with my ex. ( Read more...Collapse )

In a blink of an eye, it's the last year of 2011. I honestly can't remember much of this year except that I spent most of my (free) time golfing and gorging myself silly (I've gained 5 kg *sob*). I can't claim to have achieved anything much although overall, it's been a relatively peaceful year.

A few months ago at a client's luncheon, a few of us had our palms read (I never learn my lesson I tell yah!). My boss was telling us jokingly that palm readers will never say anything negative and always focus on the positive to make us all happy. On the contrary, this particular palm reader was really frank. The palm reader on seeing my hand peered at me and said asked "Are you currently still married?" I was taken aback but then again, I had no wedding ring on it was probably easy for him to deduce that I wasn't (well technically I still am but that's not the point). He went on to say that he was able to tell that from the lines of my palm and told me not to get married again because that it was unlikely that my future marriages (if any) will work out and that it was probably better for me to just stay single or be in a relationship without getting hitched.

Did his words affect me? Well..a little I guess. I tweeted about this and many responded that palm reading and fortune telling are usually bullshit and not to be trusted. I've never really been a superstituous person either. But somehow, a part of me still fear that what he said could be true. Maybe I am jinxed when it comes to relationships..but man, what a fatalistic attitude to have. I do know in the end, it is really up to us individuals to really make a relationship work, not something written on our palms!

I was in a 'relationship' not too long ago. To be honest, what happened to my marriage has definitely affected me. I have just too much fears and insecurities. The guy whom I was seeing on and off was a friend from the past. He was there at the time when I was still trying hard to get over the failure of my marriage. To put it simply, our timing was never in synch. When he wanted to be serious, I wasn't ready and when I was, he wasn't. I did hurt him with my fickleness and stubborness so I should have seen it coming. All this happened within a span of almost 2 years so you can imagine how complicated it was.

Heartpain..never easy no matter what age you are. I'm quite private when it comes to matters of the heart yet now, I'm revealing this in a public blog. Need to grief, let go, heal and just move on...

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.

~Neil Gaiman

Decided to go to South Korea during the one week school break since we've never been there before. Checked out several travel companies and found a tour package that I thought Aidan would find enjoyable. YC's parents (who are retired) were also keen to join us so I thought why not...Aidan would be glad to have his grandparents around & I would definitely appreciate any helping hand I may need with hyper li' one!
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Jean, Joan & I were interviewed last September for a feature in the Feb's issue of Simply Her Magazine. We were 3 of 10 women which Justina spoke to for this feature which was on the different avenues through which women find/meet their friends and in our case, it was via blogging.
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I recall being all excited last year when it was Aidan's first day in Primary One! And now he's in Primary Two already and being the ever-so-loving mom *coff*, I took leave yesterday so that I could be with him on his first day of P2! (Okay lah, I knew I would be grumpy going back to work after the nice long NY weekend so I took one more day off!) Met several pals whose kids were in ACSJ P1 this year and seeing their anxious faces reminded me of how gancheong I was last year too :)
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