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of maids & playschools~




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Spent the past few days checking out various maid agencies...and listening to friends' experiences with their maids. I think the one that took the cake was this tale told to my hubby by his ex-colleague and current smoking kaki.

Apparently, the ex-maid was with the fella's household for a whole 3 months when she decided to pilfer dough from them. They'd became more 'comfy' with her in their house and began leaving their wallets lying around. She then promptly ran away from their place after they discovered the theft. Fortunately, he bought the maid insurance so he only lost abt $200+ instead of the whole freaking $5000 - which is what u pay MOM if your maid disappears on you. Anyway, 5 days later after she had absconded with the moolah, she was found murdered in Batam..

When I heard the story, I didn't know whether to be horrified or laugh. When one hires a maid, theft and murder would be the last thing one would expect to happen (though the former is more common I guess) Oh well, I guess after hearing all these scary-maid stories, I'm more mentally prepared should anything happen *choi choi choi* But to be fair, some of my friends also have good maids who are able to care of their kids and can cook fatabulously well too. Hope I'll be just as fortunate.
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This afternoon, we decided to start our search for a suitable playgroup for Aidan. We thought we'll first look for one near my place. Never realised that there were sooooo many of them within the vincinity of Hougang/Punggol area. We made the mistake of letting Aidan enter the premises during the first 3 schools we visited. He was ecstatic when he saw all the toys around and starting 'attacking' them immediately. We had to pry the playthings from him when it was time to leave and not surprisingly, he kpkb like crazy . So in the end, dad had to stay in the car with the bugger while mom and I checked out the rest of the schools.

In one first few nursery/schools we visited, we were chatting with one of the teachers when Aidan started squealing and running about happily, with a toy in his hands.. "He's such a hyper li' boy!" I commented with a smile on my face. The lady teacher replied gravely "Yes he is very hyperactive. Did the doctor say so too?" I was blur for a while ..and simply shrugged it off.

But after a while, her comment started to bug me 'coz I'd then realised (yeah, slow huh!) what she'd actually meant. I am aware that [over-]hyperactivity in a child is sometimes associated with ADHD (Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) or ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). But I never knew that the word hyperactive has such a negative connotation. Was I using the wrong term which then led to the teacher forming such an impression of Aidan? She did have a worried look on her face after that. Should I be pissed with her for jumping to such a conclusion or am I just being overly sensitive?

Bleah......
==========================

Felt much better after booking tickets for Mamma Mia! and Michael Chiang's Private Parts using hubby's credit card. Retail therapy really works :P..

ikepod, remember to revert about Dimsum eh..I wanna see you-know-who as one of the *coff* 'hunky, extremely meaty & chunky juicy men'!


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angeliatay
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:40 pm (UTC)
Actually, there's lotsa horror stories abt maids getting ill-treated by the employers too. Now, new employers have to go tru a one day workshop where they are taught the basics of being an employer to a maid. Recently, it was reported that maids were getting dumped by the employers and some were preyed upon by prostitute rackets who send them to Batam. Quite sad actually.

I'm sure the L&O ep was based on a real case (usually is, right?).Hm..i'm not worried abt Aidan actually..just perturbed that the teacher actually jumped to such a conclusion.
daynema
Jun. 16th, 2004 01:10 pm (UTC)
Crazy teacher! What a thing to say? Hasn;t she seen active kids in her entire life? Gdness..Aidan is perfectly fine, healthy n active, dont be bothered by that comment!
angeliatay
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:47 pm (UTC)
yeah lor. After it dawned upon me what she'd meant, I felt the same way too. I was just wondering whether I'd misunderstood her with that look on her face and that 'doctor' remark, I'm pretty sure she meant it that way.
(no subject) - sansation - Jun. 16th, 2004 08:40 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Jun. 17th, 2004 03:12 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - sansation - Jun. 17th, 2004 04:27 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Jun. 18th, 2004 04:16 am (UTC) - Expand
claudiacheng
Jun. 16th, 2004 01:47 pm (UTC)
What is the teacher talking about? All children at that age are active what. I wouldn't worry about Aidan.

Good luck on the maid search. At the end of the day, it's a luck thing. Just out of curiosity, what are your maid requirements? More to take care of Aidan or to handle the housework and cooking?
angeliatay
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:54 pm (UTC)
nah..am not worried abt Aidan..more of pissed with the teacher for jumping to such a conclusion....

I agree with you that choosing a maid is purely a luck thing. I know of so many pple who uses those more known/accredited agencies but they still end up with maids who can't work well.

The maid is more to handle the household chore and cooking..My in-laws will be the one caring for Aidan more. I don't expect my in-laws to tidy up because it's not fair to them and as for me, I know I'm sure to wanna either play with Aidan or lepak around after I come back from work so probably no time to tend to the household chores :P
serphina
Jun. 16th, 2004 01:55 pm (UTC)
My family's second maid was a total nightmare. She stole my sis-in-law's wedding ring, my "minature"-diamond ring and some of our lingerie! The most evil thing she did was to place some of my items at my sis-in-law's room and vice versa, sowing discord and making it seem like we are taking each other's stuff. *shakes head*

About the hyperactive thing, the teacher must be dealing with really, really quiet kids! Both my nieces run around like banshee; kids do that what! ;)
angeliatay
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:58 pm (UTC)
woah..she actually framed u guys? Kinda devious eh. How did u guys finally found out?

Yeah lor..most kids especially boys are more active and noisy..

I was actually wondering whether it's just me using the wrong word - 'hyperactive' that made her jump to that conclusion. But it could be that coupled with the fact that Aidan was really active at that moment i said that too. Oh well *shrug*
(no subject) - serphina - Jun. 17th, 2004 02:38 pm (UTC) - Expand
fortuitous
Jun. 16th, 2004 02:15 pm (UTC)
i think some teachers can be very insensitive.

my brother was described as hyperactive when he was young, but he turned out fine.

not a big worry. :)
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 03:19 am (UTC)
he was described as hyperactive by who? doctors? teachers? or just as a general descriptive term? I never thought hyperactive meant something negative..or that it was kind of a disorder..I just took it as someone being very active..

heh..well, i know being a teacher isnt easy plus it can b quite stressful be it whether they r facing little kids or rebellious teenagers. But i think a good teacher is one who is able to perceive things/situations and make judgement properly imo..plus of coz having other positive aspects which i dun think need to be elaborated. Actually, I don't think she meant to be critical or anything actually..
(no subject) - fortuitous - Jun. 17th, 2004 02:10 pm (UTC) - Expand
stephiechai
Jun. 16th, 2004 02:38 pm (UTC)
*tsk* so annoying some people.

I wouldn't worry about Aidan if I were you. Think our 2 younger girls are just as hyper as your boy and I wouldn't even link it to ADD or ADHD.

But you can try to cut down on his sugar intake and see if it helps to mellow him down alittle.

On the maid part, try April Employment agency, we got our's from there and we have the most problem free made ever:) *fingers crossed* The lady at the agency actually shortlist based on our requirements and allowed us to interview the maid on the phone before flying her here.

Good luck :)

angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 04:41 am (UTC)
actually, im not worried abt Aidan even after the teacher's comment..I've always viewed him as a typical healthy, active boy with an inquisitive mind.

Heh..tried cutting down on sugar before..doesnt work :P..

Where is April Employment agency located eh?
(no subject) - stephiechai - Jun. 17th, 2004 09:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
debralim
Jun. 16th, 2004 02:52 pm (UTC)
good luck on your maid search. don't worry too much, a lot depends on luck. I've got 2 cousins who've got very good maids on their first try.

I think generally boys are hyper, don't think its anything wrong. I don't think its right for the teacher to jump into conclusion. Furthermore, Aidan is able to sit quietly when watching his fav show, ADHD kids won't be able to do that. As an educationalist, the teacher shd have known better than to jump into conclusion when seeing the chld for the first time.
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 04:49 am (UTC)
totally agree on ur last point..i thought the teacher was simply jumping to conclusion ..not very smart :P..

I agree that luck plays a main factor..heard of maids coming from reputed agency that turned out pretty bad..
chilli_jo
Jun. 16th, 2004 02:55 pm (UTC)
was it the teacher's first day teaching?! wah lau.. most kids at this age is liddat wat.... dun bother abt her la... :)
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 04:50 am (UTC)
heh thanks..was just a tad pissed at her for a while..u know lah, me typical mom who's pissed at anyone who dares insult my child hehehe..
miyoku
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:24 pm (UTC)
cute cute!! Aidan looks like a lil ciboy with the adorable forehead dimples in the first pic :)

Ooh man that's a freaky maid story :S I hope you will be able to find a suitable one :)

About what the teacher said: I wouldn't give it a second thought. I don't have kids mind you but he's young he's happy he's energetic!!! kids are supposed to be carefree and playful. I think it would be an issue if he wasn't active and didn't show an interest in anything. When you're that young, everything's new to you and you're free to enjoy life. Although I haven't met him in person, from all your posts about him and his daily adventures, Aidan's perfectly fine the way he is, cute,hyper curious and playful :)
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 04:56 am (UTC)
heh..i lurve his forehead dimples..he always gets them when he frowns or look really serious.

thanks for ur kind words..i personally am sure that aidan's fine..i was simply pissed with the teacher thats all :P
(no subject) - miyoku - Jun. 18th, 2004 01:41 am (UTC) - Expand
rexkids
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:39 pm (UTC)
what a thing to say? does she know ADHD?
aidan is just like any active boy I know, Jon included.

but thank god she said that, so it makes your shortlisting decision easier.

On the maid issue, well sometimes the scary stories may go out of hand and some are urban legend. I heard the cake story from so many friends who insisted it happens to their bosses. Too much a coincidence, dun you think?

So good luck on your search for a maid and playschool for aidan.
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 04:53 am (UTC)
yeah..im definitely not picking that playgroup..she already has a pre-conceived notion of aidan so i wun be sure what kinda 'treatment' he will receive from her.

Hah..u know..ive never heard of the cake story till today. After u wrote this entry..i was wondering what it was till another comment by a ljer actually elaborated on it hehe.So coincidental.
mcflurry
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:39 pm (UTC)
i think it is that other babies doesnt really have too many opportunities to get along with other babies which made them 'timid' and shy.

But aidan has been getting along with so many babies, esp. ryan (?). He has been so used to getting along with other babies, dares to grap anything he is interested, and is just so not afraid of strangers (and new objects) of any kind. He is just a very hao dung huo po, carefree, and bu pa "seng bo" (cantonese, sth unfamiliar to one) children. I think this is very good wor. about the comment, you can laugh it off.
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 04:55 am (UTC)
i personally think that alot has to do with the child's personality and nature..Aidan is naturally active and 'not-shy'. I know of kids whose moms have tried to expose them to as many friends from young but they still have stranger's anxiety and tend to be more timid.

yeah..i know i should just laugh off the comment then to be vexed abt it..:P
(no subject) - mcflurry - Jun. 17th, 2004 05:05 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Jun. 17th, 2004 05:27 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - mcflurry - Jun. 17th, 2004 05:17 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Jun. 17th, 2004 05:26 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - mcflurry - Jun. 17th, 2004 05:32 am (UTC) - Expand
yo_ichi
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:42 pm (UTC)
! I'm catching Private Parts and Mamma Mia as well! The tix for private parts are quite steep and the show is only 90 mins long!
angeliatay
Jun. 16th, 2004 04:29 pm (UTC)
Yeah..e_rambler said that it's not worth payin alot for the tix so i got cat 3 tickets!! But most of the cat 2 tix are sold out already!!
j_ecris
Jun. 16th, 2004 03:53 pm (UTC)
maid story
let me tell u abt the story of my aunt's fren's maid....the maid has been with the family for yrs and they trust her very much. One day she was going back for gd so she asked the family if she could bake a cake to bring back to her own family so her employers agreed. At the airport, she realised that she forgot to bring the cake and insisted on going home to take the cake. Her employers told her that she will miss her flight if they do so and wanted to buy her a cake at the airport. The maid made a big fuss but finally she gave in. When her employers went back home, they decided to cut the cake n eat it. Guess what they found inside the cake???? small items of jewellery they slowly lost over the years!!! To think that they trust her so much!!!!

Anyway, another maid story..this same aunt i mentioned...she have this maid for more than a decade. Nice lady who is hard working and trustworthy. The majority of her salary throughout these many years were sent back to her family back in the philipines. Eventually her hubby and kids managed to build a big and nice beach mansion. My aunt is only staying in a condo n her miad's home is many times bigger. I have seen the pic,the house is damn nice. Her family even managed to buy a small speedboat to ferry ppl to n fro the mainland and the island to earn some income. Anyway, few years ago, there was a typhoon in the island and it damanged her beach mansion so badly. My aunt's maid cried so badly as all her years of hard work were ruined by the typhoon. My aunt and uncle pitied her so they gave her sgd$6k to rebuilt the totally ruined house. Therefore, there are actually good and bad employers/employees around. It's a matter of luck. I used to have a maid from Sri Lanka who was so screwed up that we sent her back within a month. This current indo one especially for my granny is gd according to my parents but i have yet to meet her. I shall snoop on her when i go back hom. :D
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 05:00 am (UTC)
Re: maid story
hee..u know what, one lj mummy said that she's heard this cake story from numerous pple who claims that their bosses or relatives have experienced it..and she thinks it's probably an urban legend.

Hmm..weird..i've actually heard of ur other maid story before too..coincidence?

hee..i think as long as ur grandma is fine with her and ur parents think she's good..it should be okay :)
Re: maid story - j_ecris - Jun. 17th, 2004 08:44 am (UTC) - Expand
ikepod
Jun. 16th, 2004 04:14 pm (UTC)
my bro was too hyper too...and it wasnt ADHD...it was just his nature..guess they just grow up to be ...hyperactive kids! rather then Dull John over there by the swing.

shhhh...dont spoil the surprise...
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 05:01 am (UTC)
hehe dull john by the swing..farnee lah u..

heh.quick quick..go ask jerm!
jinsiew
Jun. 16th, 2004 04:31 pm (UTC)
to be honest, you are not being overly sensitive...people do associate the term 'hyperactive' with the illness...it is true. that is why most people only say their kids are more active than usual or very active...i think that is why the teacher formed that kind of impression on Aidan...better explain again if you decide to start Aidan with that childcare otherwise dunno what kind of teaching methods they will use on him...

my nephew had the same problem..extremely active..and my sister also used the term hyperactive...and she really thot he did have the illness, brought to the doctor to confirm that she was wrong...and never called her son hyperactive ever since.

you should bring Aidan to the schools to meet the teachers as well...then you can observe how they are in handling him, and also if Aidan is comfortable with them, and vice versa...as for the toys, give Aidan some warning before you guys leave so he can part with the toys...i read somewhere to sit with him, and say 'bye bye' to the toys before going...mabbe one of the adults can do that while you wrap up the discussion with the teachers?

and all the best for your search for maids...if you are keen on maids be prepared to change many times before you get the right one...and dun settle for just anyone ok...my friend changed 3-4 times (or more??) within the month before the right one came along...
angeliatay
Jun. 17th, 2004 05:06 am (UTC)
hmm ur sis called her son hyperactive because she thought he had ADD? erm..why did she think so? Again..my view is that the word hyperactive has never been thought of as a 'disorder symptom' till recent times with all the diagnosis of add and adhd..One cant simply jump to conclusion that one has that just coz of the word hyperactive imo..mebbe im making a mountain out of a molehill..

I tried the saying 'goodbye to toys'on aidan before..unfortunately, he refuses to say goodbye esp if it's a new toy. I have to let him get tired of it (which is a loooong while) in order for him not to kpkb when it's taken away from him :P..

yeah..am definitely not gonna settle for less..have to find one that we and aidan are comfy with.
(no subject) - jinsiew - Jun. 17th, 2004 01:54 pm (UTC) - Expand
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