June 18th, 2003



Aidan fell off the bed..and it's all my fault!

Ordered some nursing clothes and cloth diapers from this online store..After 3 rounds of email, the guy from the shop called me today..first to confirm on the time he was delivering the items..Called me again about 2 hours later saying he couldn't make it at specified time and will deliver tonight. And when I was playing with Aidan in my bedroom, he called yet another time..this time to tell me that the dress I ordered did not have the size I wanted. Grrr...My handphone was in the living room when it rang. I laid Aidan on the center of the bed..and quickly ran out..without erecting my usual barriers of pillows n bosters coz I was thinking I would be back in the room prompto after grabbing my phone. The minute I got to the phone, I heard a 'plop' sound comin from the room and my heart sank. I knew for sure Aidan had rolled himself off the bed. Ran to the room and saw him lying in the small little space between the bed and my side table crying. Quickly picked him up and checked his head n body to see if he was okay..He stopped wailing after a while of rocking but continued to sob softly.managed to nurse him to sleep after a while..

Was damn pissed..Initially, I was so angry at the store..for taking 3 emails & 3 damn calls just to let me know they did not have the dress in my size. But I know I was trying to put the blame on them so that I won't feel so guilty because it was my fault in the first place for not ensuring that Aidan wouldn't fall off the bed. Lily had warned me before that this would happen and that her friend's child got a large gash on his head becuz of him falling off the bed so I should have been more careful!

I have to probably get some bed-railings/barrier and child-proof the bedroom & living room real soon..Am still feeling so sore ..bah!

Aidan's okay..He has a faint red scratch mark on the lower back of his head which meant he did hit his head but he seemed alright. Will just bring my appointment with the paed forward [supposed to be next week] .. *kiasu mode*..

He'd jus woken up and had to nurse him to sleep. He hardly wakes up after his last feed so I guess he probably had a li' nightmare coz he was trashing abt before he woke up..Guess he was slightly traumatised by the fall. Sometimes, I think I baby him too much..Must learn to be strong and not to be so affected when things like that happen coz I'm sure he's gonna get more knocks and falls along the way.

Anyway..the earlier post was more of a rant coz I was so pissed at that time..I'd actually cussed loudly using the f word when I saw Aidan on the floor and yelled into the phone that I didn't want their stuff anymore..Gotta learn to be more zai! Thanks to all for your concern :)
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