TO PARENTS OF AIDAN LEE
I am writing to claim severe damage found on Ms. Chloe Ong’s hand.
As informed by the teacher and evidence written on the com book, your son, Aidan Lee’s chubby feet has stomped onto my daughter’s refine artistic right hand, which cause a permanent NIKE, no it is BATA mark on it. Due to the doubtful condition, she might not be able to join the Singapore Orchestra to play the piano, which will prevent her from generating a reasonable income of S$1,000,000.00 per performance.
Documentary evidence to show the extent of the damage & claim sum will be submitted to you in due course. You are liable for and settlement of any and all claims submitted to you immediately without delay.
Due to the substantial amount, we are asking Soh family to witness the payment. You are presumed to bring the said sum (in cash only) to Marina Square on Saturday 19 June 2005 (evening) during the Sesame Street show. Dinner can be arranged before or after the event. Kindly let me know if you are coming or you prefer to settle by telegraphic transfer.
Corrina & Darren Ong
Attention : Parents of Chloe Ong
Take note that you may be liable for any misrepresentation and or slander
and or libel as determined by a court of law.
We hereby insist that you inter alia:
(1) provide such evidence of damage to Chole's hand and evidence that such damage was caused by our Aidan Lee; and
(2) in the event that such evidence (as may be acceptable to us in our sole discretion) is furnished in (1) above, provide us with such evidence to dis-prove that Chole did not intentionally cause her hand to be placed under our Aidan Lee's shoes in either a vain attempt to attract his attention and or to outrage the modesty of his feet; and
(3) in the event that such evidence (as may be acceptable to us in our sole discretion) is furnished in (2) above, provide us with such evidence to highlight her so-called musical ability, by playing for us Beethoven Symphony No. 5 in such form and manner as may be deemed to be acceptable in our refined taste.
Please address all future correspondence to our solicitors, Lee & Lee who
will undoubtedly be able to prove the futility of your claims, and in all likelihood will be filing counter claims for damages incurred to our good reputation as well as the possibility of sullying the pristine innocence of our Aidan Lee, as well as the possiblity that the sole of his shoe may have been irreparably dirtied with the intentional placement of a chubby hand thereby weakening the prospect of him securing the marriage of a sole daughter of a multi-trillionaire thereby causing such irreparable psychological and emotional trauma to his beloved parents.
Parents of Aidan Lee Zhongyi