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with this ring~

"N.,take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the HolySpirit." —from the Roman Catholic Rite of Marriage"


Honestly, I've never thought about this much till I read Sesame's post..Thought it would be interesting to have your opinion on the wearing of the wedding band. I think I could be one of the minority group of married woman who seldom wears her wedding ring. Usually, the husbands are the one who try to avoid wearing it citing reasons like "it would get lost when I play golf/I'll scratch/ruin it/too tight lah!. I wore it the most during my first year of marriage and it was a very conscious act for me because I'm not exactly a 'ring' person. Necklaces & earrings - yes..rings & bracelets..no. I stopped wearing it for a while when I got pregnant abt 4 years ago as my fingers [along with the rest of my body] swelled up to double their original size. It was only about 1 1/2 years back that the ring was able to slide pass the knuckle of my wedding-band finger. I was delirously happy then..not because I could finally wear the ring, but because it proved that I'd [finally] lost most of the weight I'd gained during my pregnancy. My other half wears it most of the time. He only takes it off together with his watch when he comes home. In a way, I'm kinda flattered that he does make an effort to do so..but he's also said that it's sort of a habit already.

I know some people view the ring as a sign of commitment, affection and fidelity to the other half..and by not wearing it, one could be trying to give the impression that they are single and available. But to me, what's more important is the couple's commitment to each other. The ring is only a jewelry..and at most, a symbol of the marriage..but it isn't what makes a couple married. A ring isn't going to stop anyone from cheating..be it the wearer or the tempter. And I know of some women who actually finds married men more attractive so letting your husband wear the ring may not be a good idea afterall (joking hor!) :P

But maybe, I should get myself this 'Remember Ring'...

Apparently, 24 hours before the wearer's anniversary, the Remember Ring’s “hot spot” will heat up to120º F, for about ten seconds every hour! ALL. DAY. LONG.But I gotta first remember to wear it :P

Oh,but I did [remember to] wear my ring on our wedding anniversary dinner at Morton's this year =)


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Comments

( 74 comments — Leave a comment )
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smallbully
Nov. 2nd, 2006 01:52 pm (UTC)
i like the pic of the 2 of u! nice ;)
angeliatay
Nov. 2nd, 2006 01:53 pm (UTC)
thanks =)
i like it too because i think we have fu-chi xiang hehe
(no subject) - smallbully - Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:24 pm (UTC) - Expand
tangledshe
Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:04 pm (UTC)
so pretty pic!
dotteddreams
Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:12 pm (UTC)
lovely picture! hehe!
rijac
Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:15 pm (UTC)
hmmm... my ring is huge. it gets very uncomfortable if i had to carry heavy groceries while wearing it. but i usally wear it if i am going out alone (and make sure the wife sees me put it on!).

if i am with my wife or kids i sometimes don't bother (erm... wife and kids quite obviously are easier to notice than a ring!)

but i like the design so i don't mind wearing it despite of what it symbolizes. besides at 950 per ring, its too expensive to be left collecting dust!

angeliatay
Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:20 pm (UTC)
eh you wear it to assure your wife? and you agree that by not wearing it, you could end up giving the wrong signals to others?

actually, i liked the design of my ring too. I chose it what! But it doesnt make it wanna wear it everyday. But i do make it a point to wear it for impt occasions..eg, interviews, big events, cny visits etc..
(no subject) - rijac - Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:24 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
ribenapower
Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:20 pm (UTC)
hey angelia, that's a lovely picture of you and your hubby..! so happy and you look really good! hmmm.. still so blissful after 7 yrs.. got chance share how to keep a marriage going eh.. hahahaha :)
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 12:24 am (UTC)
heh a lovely picture doesnt always mean a good marriage..

and honestly, im in no position to share how to keep a good marriage going on..i think all r/ships are different and it always boils down to the individuals on how they keep their marriage together..for me, i think im blessed because my other half is really a fab guy and on my part, i have to constantly remind myself not to take him for granted. having a great kiddo like aidan too helps bring a new dimension to our r/ship!
merman13
Nov. 2nd, 2006 02:55 pm (UTC)
Very nice and loving couple pic!! :P

I do know of friends who are not used to wearing rings on their fingers choosing to wear their wedding rings on a chain around the neck instead, like a pendant. Methinks it's a cool option. :P
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 12:25 am (UTC)
heh i know of some pple doing that too but some see it as a way of 'hiding' the wedding ring too!!
(no subject) - merman13 - Nov. 3rd, 2006 12:46 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - merman13 - Nov. 3rd, 2006 12:48 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:11 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - merman13 - Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:17 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:21 am (UTC) - Expand
pendant - cestmoiperidot - Dec. 24th, 2006 01:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Anonymous)
Nov. 2nd, 2006 06:43 pm (UTC)
Hahaha...I was too polite in my comment...actually wanted to say you think like a man...but now that you said it yourself...heehee. True about what you say about the commitment part. That it shouldn't be tied to a ring. Just that for my case, my hubs faithfully wore his for 5 years before our kid arrived. Then after our kid arrived, he seemed to have taken on a different mentality...plus I am the insecure sort so this sort of thing does bug me at times. :p Sesame
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 12:35 am (UTC)
heheh..my doctor actually suspects i have pcos & one of the characteristics of this ailment is having high levels of male hormones..which may explain~~

well, it is a bit strange that he had been wearing it faithfully for 5 years and then stopped. But i reckon it should take more than just the non-wearing of the band to become suspcious & think he wants to be seen as available..and i can tell from ur post that you know it isnt true deep down inside..
myeisha_l
Nov. 2nd, 2006 06:44 pm (UTC)
Glad that you share your thoughts on this. I used to think that wearing of the band is optional as I'm not quite a ring person also. However in the recent years especially after I've gotten engaged, I'm beginning to enjoy wearing the ring because of what it reminds me of. As such, i'm probably gonna be wearing my wedding band most of the time after I wed. Stvn is totally not a ring person and he has indicated that he will make an effort to wear it when he's with me. I'm not too upset about it because it doesn't mean that he is less committed or anything. He just doesn't like to wear ring. Like what you've said what's more important is the couple's commitment to each other which can be shown in many other ways. Wearing the band is just one of them.
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:14 am (UTC)
heh ..i wore my engagement ring (yeah, flashed the nice 0.5 carat bugger to anyone and everyone hehe) quite regularly too before i got married.

when's the big day? =)
(no subject) - myeisha_l - Nov. 3rd, 2006 10:10 am (UTC) - Expand
moxielass
Nov. 2nd, 2006 08:43 pm (UTC)
I am the minority too. Heck I lost my wedding ring when I moved house! Now I have to try and recall where I put away my engagement ring. It's not lost coz I must have put it in somewhere so safe that I can't recall now. :P
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:15 am (UTC)
does andrew knows *grin*?
(no subject) - moxielass - Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:43 am (UTC) - Expand
alisonrae
Nov. 2nd, 2006 09:11 pm (UTC)
Both K and I have lost our wedding rings several times. He's more faithful about wearing his than I am, mostly because I have a lot of rings and keep rotating them – and I have a policy of only wearing one ring at any one time so the wedding ring gets taken off a lot.

Also, I think he wears it to let people know he's married. He always kena beo by both sexes for some reason (not say very hamsome or what right). Haha!
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:18 am (UTC)
heh, i've lost my ring several times too but fortunately, it managed to get found.

Ur abang quite goodlooking lah! so not surprising that he kena beo-ed so often although that ring probably aint gonna stop the beo-ing much!
stephiechai
Nov. 2nd, 2006 10:12 pm (UTC)
Non of us are too faithful about wearing our rings. But I took on to wearing it now cos my finger has shrung back to size liao ;) ( of course due to the multiple pregnancies I went thru *sigh*) and I'm afraid of losing it due to all the shifting episodes.

Hey, you both look so good in the pix lah :)


angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:04 am (UTC)
heh..happy right when it was able to fit again?!!
(no subject) - stephiechai - Nov. 3rd, 2006 03:17 am (UTC) - Expand
jinsiew
Nov. 2nd, 2006 10:14 pm (UTC)
ever since gabe came along, we have stopped wearing the rings...both ming and i :) my finger got too big from the water retention during the pregnancy and ming, well...his got too big too from eating too much of my leftover craving food :p after gabe was born we just never got back to wearing it, with excuses of fearing of scracthing the baby etc. now...well...see no point coz we didnt engrave the wedding date to the ring so serve no purpose in reminding us too!!

but i must say....that is one great ring, we so needed that to remind ourselves...every year we will have problem in first remembering which day was the actual wedding anniversary date..and secondly, how many years have we been married again? that kind of problem hehe....now we rely on my LJ :p terrible!!
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:47 am (UTC)
Ming doesn't looked like he's put on any weight!

heh, im truly bad with dates...and i thought its only the men who have that problem..!
(no subject) - jinsiew - Nov. 3rd, 2006 03:17 am (UTC) - Expand
ickleoriental
Nov. 2nd, 2006 10:23 pm (UTC)
that's such a gorgeous picture!!

well, aiden is now your wedding ring! *giggle*
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:19 am (UTC)
heh, i cant help but agree. most pple know abt my aidan so they should know I'm married =)
chanrkl
Nov. 2nd, 2006 10:41 pm (UTC)
we both wear our wedding rings daily... i used to wear rings all day long but got influenced by him when he takes it off in the night. V seems to find it pretty important to wear and does enter into a state of panic if he loses it... (about 3 times now!)

for me, its an outward sign of commitment to marriage because acquaintances or new "friends" might not know either of us are married or single. and hmm, i recently found out a LOT of the teachers in the Sunday church prog think i'm NOT married! *slaps forehead*
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:03 am (UTC)
hmm, i just realised something else. I'm not very observant when it comes to ring. even though i like to beo pple, i usually focus on their face and butt..seldom on the ring finger, even if i find the person attractive..:P

furthermore, i know of pple who loves wearing rings..who wear the jewelry on almost all their fingers..married or not..so it even f there's a band on that finger, it doesnt necessary mean the person is married :P
musomuse
Nov. 2nd, 2006 10:50 pm (UTC)
My dad wears his ring all the time that now it has gotten so tight (gained weight!) he cannot take it off even if he wants to..

Girls still beo him lah, ring not an indicator of 'taken' status at all..
angeliatay
Nov. 3rd, 2006 12:47 am (UTC)
that probably means you have a yandao dad! have u posted his pic before?
(no subject) - musomuse - Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:23 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - angeliatay - Nov. 3rd, 2006 01:24 am (UTC) - Expand
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